Initially, I was in a rush to get back to Chicago in April so my patients would still remember me (silly, I know). But then Covid hit…so I decided to stay put in Kentucky instead. By the time I was finishing up in Kentucky, my contract was finally the way I wanted it to be. Right before I was going to sign it, I decided to reach out to my boss one more time to make sure we were on the same page. That I was planning on returning to my previous clinic in Chicago, to reacquire my previous patient panel.
He said that was fine but he wanted to talk to the new medical director of that clinic to make sure there were no issues (he had recently been promoted). The next thing I know the new medical director was requesting a phone conference with me and the PCP lead at that clinic.
Apparently, they weren’t happy with my request to come back. Mostly because to them it wasn’t reasonable for me to have my patients back. They didn’t think it was fair to the new PCP that had covered my patient panel, to lose those patients. Honestly, it was ridiculous to me that they were so against it. I had spoken to that PCP prior to me leaving asking her if it was okay for me to return and take back my patients, and she said yes. Also, it’s not like I would force the patients to come back to me. The reality is that the majority of them were still asking for me on a regular basis so I knew most of them would return to me. However, the medical director did not want me to announce my return and would only give me back a patient that asked for me directly.
I thought that was unjust, because a patient would have to incidentally see me in the clinic before they could become my patient again. I was appalled by the conversation because they were even interrogating me about the needs of the clinic. Saying there weren’t many new patients at this time and asking what I would do if I couldn’t fill up my panel. They acted as if I was in an interview not realizing that I already had the job!
The silliest part is that the new PCP who has my patients is pregnant and going on maternity leave later this year. So, she would need someone to see those patients eventually anyways. The interrogation ended with them going to ask the new PCP if she was ok with it and let me know the following day. I spoke to the new PCP again myself and she reassured me she was still fine with it (she is really down to earth).
I spoke to my boss after the phone meeting, and he admitted that the physicians are jealous of me because I constantly outshined them when I was there!
The following day the new medical director emailed me and told me my services were not needed at that clinic in Chicago. That’s it.
I was in shock. I was going to follow up with the CMO, who practically created that position for me, but I decided to sleep on it instead. The next day I woke up and had an epiphany that this was not meant to be. I had jumped through so many hurdles already, between creating that position and negotiating the terms of my contract for months.
If I went back there with the physicians in leadership against me, I would have a target on my back and more stress than I would ever want. Plus, who wants to be in such a toxic environment?
It also made me realize that I truly did not want to move to Chicago. When I was looking at housing options, I felt like most areas were unsafe. Not to mention that housing in downtown Chicago costs a fortune. I was having a hard time transitioning from paying $0 per month for housing to paying $2500/mo. I especially couldn’t picture myself living in freezing weather away from my family for at least 2 years of my life. It was just a sacrifice I was willing to make to be at a job that I enjoyed.
To be honest, I had just felt pressured to return to Chicago. Mostly by my patients that I had developed bonds with and who were expecting me back. I didn’t want to feel that guilt again the way I did when I left my patient panel after one year in Virginia. I also felt like the majority of my co-workers (the ones who weren’t jealous lol) wanted me to come back.
Once I let go of those expectations, I knew that this was a sign from God and that everything happens for a reason. I told my boss it was ok, but it was over. He immediately asked if I could help as a locums at one of their other Chicago clinics. They seriously don’t waste time asking for help….even when they screw you over.
I said no thanks, I just wanted to be close to home for now. The other physicians of that clinic and some of the support staff were disappointed that I was not coming back, but were understanding since they have to deal with the horrible leadership there on a regular basis.
If they asked me to cover that maternity leave, I wonder if I would say yes just to see my old patients or if I would say no just to be spiteful 😉
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